It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
