Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
