Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Plan B is the new Plan A
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I intend to get homeless drunk
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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