Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
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