sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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