i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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