life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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