Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm too high and old for this...
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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