You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
