making cat noises will not fix the situation.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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