It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
