Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively. http://tfl.nu/sa2o
  Replies (6) Good night (1315) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  i really like this girl i slept with last night

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you ask her out again?

  (703): View more from Virginia

  yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): i really like this girl i slept with last night (202): you ask her out again? (703): yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married http://tfl.nu/y34d
  Replies (7) Good night (2791) Bad night (2343)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler http://tfl.nu/3vc3
  Replies (36) Good night (564) Bad night (4984)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  you are hot. that is all.

  (1-480): View more from Arizona

  who is this?

  (480): View more from Arizona

  the delivery driver from silvermine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): you are hot. that is all. (1-480): who is this? (480): the delivery driver from silvermine. http://tfl.nu/dvq3
  Replies (32) Good night (5614) Bad night (1494)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds! http://tfl.nu/6diw
  Replies (62) Good night (6660) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk. http://tfl.nu/e85f
  Replies (12) Good night (4644) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home. http://tfl.nu/c9s9
  Replies (45) Good night (12053) Bad night (1306)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Drunk

  (845): View more from New York

  Deyhxbr

  (845): View more from New York

  Fucaerrrrr

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Drunk (845): Deyhxbr (845): Fucaerrrrr http://tfl.nu/ddt4
  Replies (10) Good night (2631) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed. http://tfl.nu/u516
  Replies (7) Good night (1097) Bad night (2154)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not. http://tfl.nu/o6ew
  Replies (3) Good night (1726) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (979): I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system. http://tfl.nu/cus3
  Replies (14) Good night (2025) Bad night (1170)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you http://tfl.nu/72n4
  Replies (15) Good night (2280) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home http://tfl.nu/e4lh
  Replies (4) Good night (855) Bad night (561)
• Favorite

  (627): View more from California

  some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (627): some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE. http://tfl.nu/adi8
  Replies (9) Good night (1902) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects. http://tfl.nu/f5x4
  Replies (3) Good night (298) Bad night (1037)

Randomize