Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(840): View more from

Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****

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(840): Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to ***** http://tfl.nu/9ulm

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(831): View more from California

Hey, what are you up to?

(802): View more from Vermont

Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.

(802): View more from Vermont

Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.

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(831): Hey, what are you up to? (802): Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds. (802): Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard. http://tfl.nu/ope5

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(630): View more from Illinois

dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!

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(630): dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg! http://tfl.nu/jn1p

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(416): View more from Toronto

I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on

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(416): I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on http://tfl.nu/c1eq

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(210): View more from Texas

happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.

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(210): happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal. http://tfl.nu/4nij

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(817): View more from Texas

Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.

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(817): Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea. http://tfl.nu/vfyw

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(443): View more from Maryland

please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow

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(443): please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow http://tfl.nu/myf2

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(440): View more from Ohio

omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had

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(440): omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had http://tfl.nu/fpfu

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(573): View more from Missouri

My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.

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(573): My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son. http://tfl.nu/oti7

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(206): View more from Washington

Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.

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(206): Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night. http://tfl.nu/k94l

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(813): View more from Florida

Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking

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(813): Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking http://tfl.nu/kd2w

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(315): View more from New York

That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?

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(315): That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad? http://tfl.nu/bcm2

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(714): View more from California

No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.

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(714): No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/hejd

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(573): View more from Missouri

Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.

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(573): Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex. http://tfl.nu/smrh

Replies (12) Good night (1482) Bad night (501)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...

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(218): I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin... http://tfl.nu/zsou

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