We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
