At least make sure they are 18
Why
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
