Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
