i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
