well I can't set my house on fire every night
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
