i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
