Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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