you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
A bitchslap is in order.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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