i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
