she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
