Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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