One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
