love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
