I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
