For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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