dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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