i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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