Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
