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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.

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  23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories

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• (206): View more from Washington

  My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.

  (415): View more from California

  Why?

  (206): View more from Washington

  Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.

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  These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not

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