My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize