Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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