suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
If I die, sorry about rent.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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