is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
