I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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