Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
