some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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