ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
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