Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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