Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
