I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
