PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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