if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
