let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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