I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I had to cum in my sink.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize