I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
