Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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