omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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