so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
