Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

New invention idea: vibrating tampons

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(205): View more from Alabama

HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.

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(631): View more from New York

so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.

(631): View more from New York

what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK

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(631): View more from New York

i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth

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(859): View more from Kentucky

the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.

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(937): View more from Ohio

I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.

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(917): View more from New York City

Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.

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(516): View more from New York

I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.

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