we're chasing vodka with high fives
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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