so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i would punch a child for taco bell
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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