Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
