Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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